Boku No Skrillage
by Boku Boku Boku desu
Summary: #swahili


**So one fine kawaii day, Skrillage was in the bathroom, watching iCarly on his toaster powered by Maple Leaf Butchers, he felt his loins rumbling. He wanted her, he wanted her now.**

"Kawi D! Where are you baby, I want to felch that fine ass of yours!" Skrillage yelled down the hallway.

"I'm sorry Skrilly, but I need to fix the kitchen to make some sandwiches." Kawi replied.

"Fuck you bitch, I need to train for the UFC." Skrillage moaned orgasmiclly.

Suddenly there came a fapping as of someone gangster fapping, fapping on the bathroom floor. Quoth Painbow Bash, "I'm a whore."

"I need my tampons, Painbow. Where are my Tampax?!" Skrillage whispered whilst he was rubbing his intestines.

"Sorry Skrilly, but Fedex is kind of slow today. Something on the news about a plane crash over some island.. with a guy, and his volleyball. I don't fucking know, whatever." Painbow replied sheepishly, wiping her gloriously shiny wings with a dildo.

Skrillage felt uneasy, as though something bad was going to happen to someone he cared about.

He was right. The moment he thought that, God peered into his mind and though it would be funny to fuck with Skrillage a bit. So God sent the Nickelbacks and the Equestria Hit-Squad down to the local Wendy's, just as Skrillage's friends; Carlswagin' and 2Pack got to the parking lot to make out in their car.

"Oh shit.. Sorry Skrillage, the Equestria Hit-Squad is texting me to go kill some faggots at the Wendy's. I'll try to be back by 8, see you later!" Painbow exclaimed as she rushed out the door.

"What the dick? Some faggots.. down at the Wendy's.. Oh no. That can only mean Carlswagin' and 2Pack! My friends are in danger!" Skrillage roared furiously.

As he was about to rush out the door, his prostate fell out of his anus. So he went to the kitchen, handed it to Kawi D and said, "Alright bitch-woman. My prostate fell out again. Cook it, so I can eat it and get it back in my body again." He was so focused on getting his precious prostate that he forgot all about his friends the faggots.

Meanwhile down at Wendy's, Carlswagin' and 2Pack were making out in their 2015 Saleen S7. Over at the side, Chuck Norris was beating the actual living shit out of the Equestria Hit-Squad. Nickelback grew a pussy and ran away from the fight. Carlswagin' and 2Pack heard the shit yelling about being prematurely excreted, and looked out their window. Carlswagin's eyes locked with those of Chuck Norris.

"Oh my dear god, its that there American Jesus, CHUCK NORRIS!11!ONE!1 How can that be? I thought he was in Afghaniraqistan, humping Jewish transexuals! I didn't think he'd be back so soon!" Carlswagin' said mournfully.

"What's wrong, baby. You know that guy?" 2Pack said like a fucking moron.

"Yeah, I'm married to him, and cheating on him with you. I think we're gonna die now." Carlswagin' responded.

"Yeah, that's cool." 2Pack said like a true Level 85 Warrior Nigga.

Chuck Norris heard the chattering noise in the car and faced the other direction because he has eyes at the back of his head. "WHAT IS THIS SORCERY YOU HAVE DONE?" he bellowed.

"Chuck, we must settle this matter." claimed Carlswagin'. "In a DUEL!"

"Me too!" exclaimed 2Pack. And so the duel of the millenium faggots began.

Chuck Norris flexed and grew a duel disk out of his Armstrong. Very appropriate. Carlswagin' grabbed one of the winged doors on his car and ripped it off with his Handimatic. 2Pack pulled out his iPhone Ω and loaded his duelling application. He synced it using Autotune™ by Lil Wayne with his foe, and Carlswagin'. A three person duel, it was to be. However 2Pack and Carlswagin' formed a semen pact. They were now allied against the looming evil that was Hitler.. Norris. The Double Innuendo against the Single Hitler, who was lonely because his mother broke up with him.

"Let the duel commence." A strange robotic voice said, coming from seemingly nowhere, but it was actually the drive-thru worker using the Wendy's loudspeaker.

"I shall begin." stated Chuck Adolf. "I summon Chuck Norris in face-down Attack position. This effect allows me to Special Summon 10 Chuck Norris's from anywhere on Earth. I attack you even though it's first turn because I'm Chuck Norris. He has an Attack Power of over 12. I'm not telling you what it is.. But it's higher than 12." Meanwhile 2Pack falls asleep and is taken over by 3Pack, an ancient negro princess of duelling.

"My turn!" screamed 3Pack. "I banish my trap card from my hand to end my turn!"

"Good job 2Pack!" declared Carlswagin'. "This means I get to go to my turn faster! My turn, draw! I end my turn."

"Fuck, that was a good move." Hitler stated. "Because you made such a good move, my Norris monsters are automatically destroyed from over-exposure to good move. Now you have more cards in your hand and my turn is skipped!"

"Just as I planned." Carlswagin' said quizzically. "I don't know what the fuck just happened, but all I know is I'm winning now.'

"I guess it's my turn now!" 3Pack shrieked. "I summon 1 Booty Warrior in Defense mode. And because I have 1 Booty Warrior in my hand, I can banish it to add 1 Booty Token to my Booty Warrior. And by banishing 1 Booty Token, I can summon 1 monster whose level is equal to the number of white people in your Graveyard. Go Big Lips Lafawnda! But she's a big fat black lady so she can't attack for 1 turn."

"Also, what the actual fuck happened there?!" Carlswagin' said whilst jerking off because he was hard from watching his manfriend play a children's card game.

"He's very low on life points now!" 3Pack exclaimed (even though Chuck Adolf had not taken any damage this duel.) "Carl, you must finish him quickly before he activates the Holocaust Bomb!"

"I guess it's up to me now!" quoted Carlswagin'.

He looked at his cards. There can only be one move made, and it had to be the best one. He mustered all the strength he had and all the soul energy he collected to state, "I choose you, Rattata! Now go and give Hitler Norris SUPER AIDS!"

And that was the move that ended the battle of a lifetime. Chuck Norris lost all his Super Saiyan powers, and became a milkman, until 25 years later. He died, of SUPER AIDS.. It was a sad day for all white people and Americans alive. For the greatest man that their race had ever seen, had perished. But he killed Roshan and had an Aegis of the Immortals. So he came back to life, gathered his milkman gear, and ventured on to give his special milk to all the little boys and girls of the world.

Back at the house of Skrillage, Kawi D had just finished cooking up some nice tasty prostate for Skrillage to consume, only to eventually fall out of his anus at a later date. It was good. Not too salty, not too spicy. It tasted a lot like... prostate.

"Goddamnit woman, why can you make my prostate taste so good? It's like I'm eating a prostate!" Skrillage exclaimed.

"Well that's because I tickled it with an egg beater until it was just tender enough to deep fry in vagina." Kawi D replied. She smiled, because she didn't really deep fry it in her vagina.  
It was Painbow Dash's vagina it was deep fried in. Not that it matters..


End file.
